While reading Luka’s blog, incogblogo, I came across an interesting question she posted.

“say you found out that your best friend, by some amazing set of coincidences, was your sibling.  what would your reaction be?”

This question has really stuck in my head because this very situation is a real possibility for me at some point in the future. I have never met my biological father. He knew about my conception but was out of my mother’s life before I was ever born, so he never knew anything about my birth or even if I was a boy or a girl. If he ever thinks of me at all, I am just a vague knowledge that he has a child out there somewhere.

At the time I was conceived, he was a married man with an infant daughter. This daughter is a sister I have never seen and never known. As far as I know, she doesn’t even know I exist. If my biological father and his wife went on to have more children, a very real possibility, I could have even more siblings I know nothing about.

What bothers me most is they are from this city, the city I live in, the city I grew up in, but until a few years ago I never knew about them or about the circumstances of my birth. My mother says the last she heard of him, nearly 35 years ago, he was still living in the area but she didn’t know where. She hasn’t heard of him since. I wonder, how many times in my life could I have come in contact with him or a sibling and never even known it? They could live down the street and I would not know. Even if I came face-to-face with my father, I would never recognize his face because I have never seen him, not even a picture. All I know of him now is his name and a few details. Attempts to find him have led nowhere.

I wonder about him. I wonder about my unknown siblings. I wonder about the sister I’ve never met.

If I found out one day that my best friend was also my sibling, what would I do? I would jump for joy. I would want to know everything about her. I would want to meet and get to know the family that has been missing from my life. I would hope that my father is everything I imagine him to be. I would finally feel whole as the missing puzzle pieces of my life and my identity finally fell into place. Basically, I would celebrate.